#96 – Schoolyard Blues

I survived my first mentoring session this afternoon, barely. Curiously, when his teacher introduced me to my mentee, Ernie, I saw no overt signs of berserker. He looked rather ordinary: a bit stocky perhaps, and (from what I was told) on the tall side for his age. And nothing in his outward appearance suggested Satan’s spawn. Frankly, I thought his cherubic face, innocent brown eyes, and close-cropped mat of black hair more reminiscent of a harmless Chia pet than the marauder he turned out to be.

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#103 – Battleship

I completed my second mentoring session with Ernie today, this time in the school library. Having him anchored at a table (instead of running amok on the playground, like last week) provided my first opportunity to chat with him, man to man. But he acted so closed-mouth at first, I began to think I’d do better reading him his Miranda rights and interrogating him.

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#117 – Grandmaster Flash

Despite my best intentions, I fear the mentoring gods continue to frown on my sessions with Ernie. I’m sincerely trying to influence the perverted cheater in a positive way, but doing so hasn’t proved easy. Today I suggested a game of chess, figuring the kid’s little grey cells would be so focused on the game’s strategy he wouldn’t have a chance to pull his usual shenanigans.

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#133 – A Word of Thanks

My nephew, the college senior, called last night to thank me for a piece of advice I gave him several years ago. “Uncle Richard,” he said, “I had my first beer and tequila blackout this weekend. I couldn’t remember shit the next morning, and I’m sure glad I listened when you told me to lose my virginity first and then start drinking heavily! Thanks a lot!”

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#138 – Flu You!

I don’t like needles. Consequently, I don’t enjoy having my blood drawn, and I avoid getting shots whenever possible. That’s why I haven’t had a flu shot in years. As I figured, since I don’t have kids and aren’t around them much, I’d be safe enough without a vaccination. And up till now, my reasoning’s panned out. The flu hasn’t hit me since I was a kid. Even so, thanks to today’s mentoring session I’ve reevaluated my logic.

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