#221 – Nobody’s Pigeon

What’s in a name? I’d say “a lot,” especially in light of this afternoon’s conversation with Mary Pidgeon. I picked my wife up at her office today for one of our rare lunch dates. While she finished a task, she left me in the care of a co-worker, Mary. Mary knew I practiced law and asked whether I did any matrimonial work. When I answered in the affirmative, she told me her husband had just filed for divorce. Then she asked: “Will it be easy for me to take my maiden name again?”

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#223 – A Weighty Issue

The new client I obtained this morning, “Ralph,” is a twenty-four-year-old, six-foot tall, handsome man with a thick head of coal black hair and a dazzling smile. Of equal significance, he weighs in at a hefty 388 pounds. I mention these attributes because they feature prominently in Ralph’s proposed lawsuit… against his twin brother, “Fred.”

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#227 – New Beginnings

I’ve tried home-brewed beer on a number of occasions, and I’ve liked some of it. Once I tasted homemade wine and thought it decent enough as well. And thanks to my friend Jimmy, I now can add basement coffee to my testing list. Except, unlike the other beverages, I have no desire whatsoever to repeat this morning’s Arabica bean experience.

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#228 – Winter Wonderland

My friend Ned spent half the afternoon today fielding calls from every neighbor within sight of his backyard. Though the caller differed each time he answered his office phone, the irate diatribes all sounded the same. Each conversation featured variations of the words “pervert,” “obscene,” and “pornographic.” Utterly mystified, Ned left work early to investigate these complaints.

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#229 – Watch Your Spouse, or Else

If I recall correctly, President Carter once admitted to looking on other women with lust and having committed adultery in his heart. I think most would agree that there’s nothing wrong with a married person fantasizing about another, as long as the spouse doesn’t act on those feelings. But the line starts to blur when married people make excuses to interact time and again with the objects of their fantasies. When that happens, mere looking can transform to outright cheating in a heartbeat; just ask my friend Stan.

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