#193 – Tis the Season

I’ve had to learn the hard way that many temps just don’t give a crap. Whenever I’ve hired temporary secretaries to fill in for my regular assistant, they’ve displayed the kind of disinterest typically seen from the people in orange jumpsuits spearing roadside trash. And those were the intelligent ones! The less intellectually gifted souls who’ve shown up at my office compounded their lackadaisical attitudes with an equal dose of ineptitude. And as I discovered today, the temp who messed up my holiday gift order must be the poster child for both deficiencies.

Continue reading

#197 – Setting the Table

Some may wonder why I haven’t written further about the relationship counseling between me and my mother-in-law. Oh yes, that cash siphoning fiasco continues from week to week. But Sophia has strictly forbidden me from publishing another word on it. As directed, I’ll refrain from commenting on yesterday’s session with “Dr. Freud” and instead will share the story Ron told me this morning.

Continue reading

#198 – The Tennis Elbow

My brother finally got around to fixing his tennis elbow. Unsurprisingly, Frank insists normal repetitive stress from too many hours hitting balls caused his injury. I beg to differ though. Knowing him for the poor loser he’s always been, I think his elbow suffered more shocks from smashing tennis rackets and ping pong paddles than it could handle.

Continue reading

#199 – The Miracle of Christmas

I’m beginning to think there’s something to this whole Christmas miracle thing. At least, I have no better explanation for the affection I received from Sophia’s family this morning. Along with Prometheus, we traveled bright and early to my in-laws’ house for the annual exchange of Christmas gifts. Knowing Sophia’s family tolerates me like a recurring case of herpes, I’d pulled out all the stops in this year’s shopping. And my extra effort paid off!

Continue reading