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My wife and I squabble occasionally, and like every other couple we have our issues. On the whole though, I’ve always considered our marriage a strong one. I’ve also thought the people who know us best believed the same. But after my latest Facebook snafu, I’m beginning to wonder.

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While watching Prometheus and his canine buddy at play last night, I pointed out to my wife that dogs unthinkingly live their lives practicing the same attitudes which humans espouse but rarely follow. Sophia typically disagrees with my observations on human nature, so her sarcastic response didn’t surprise me.

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My wife hosted her second “lia Sophia” jewelry party last night. Just because I accidentally embarrassed her at the last one by mounting a custom “fathead” of her in curlers and a revitalizing mask on the kitchen wall, she’d given me strict orders to stay away from the shindig. “It’s for women only, anyway,” she added. “And you know what they say, Richard: ‘Out of sight, out of mind!’”

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I finally got my pesky bleeder taken care of today. My leaky nostril that is. After weeks suffering involuntary bloodlettings, I bit the bullet and asked my doctor to cauterize the defective nasal vessel. I had no choice, however. As my wife proclaimed, my nose and I would have to sleep elsewhere if we didn’t resolve our problem pronto.

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The only other time I had a conversation as veiled as today’s, internet porn was the topic and the stakes were my continued employment. Pornography did not figure in this afternoon’s chat, for which I’m grateful. Nonetheless, as before I expected to hear my services would no longer be welcomed. I didn’t though, and for an understandable reason.

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I still can’t believe I’m going to relationship counseling. Indeed, I never imagined matters getting so bad that a mediator’d be needed. But my wife insisted, so I didn’t have much of a choice. The first session was today, and the therapist insists he can help. But what else could he say?

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There’s a concept in real estate known as home flipping. It generally involves: purchasing a residence; making minimal cosmetic improvements, like painting and carpet cleaning; and then selling the place quickly for a profit. Today I witnessed the practice in action for the first time, on a human.

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