#34 – Anything but the Truth

Since I’m not presently welcome at the in-laws’ residence, I told Sophia’s visiting nephew, Nunzio, he could stop by our house today and throw a ball around.  In the midst of playing catch, the 15-year-old surprised me with a bunch of questions about drugs.  No kid had ever posed those inquiries to me before; nor did I have a clue as to the experts’ recommendations under such circumstances.  Not seeing any better alternative, I decided to give him the unvarnished truth.  Here’s the meat of our conversation. 

“Uncle Richard, did you ever do drugs?” 

“Sure Nunzio; back in college.” 

“Which ones did you take?” 

“Hmm, let me see:  acid; cocaine; magic mushrooms; Quaaludes; speed; hashish; and of course marijuana.  Probably a few others too, though I can’t recall them at the moment.” 

“Did you like them?” 

Admittedly, even I saw the warning flags in that question. But “in for a penny in for a pound,” as the old saying goes: “Well Nunzio, I liked most of them and I loved some of them.” 

I won’t repeat the rest of our conversation verbatim.  Suffice it to say, at the boy’s insistent urging, I recited several of my extremely enjoyable experiences with illegal substances.  I did attempt to stress my rather abrupt decision to quit drug experimentation altogether; however, I’m afraid that message didn’t sink in quite as well as I would’ve liked.  Nonetheless, I commended my own honesty, figuring that’s all anyone could ask. 

I apparently have a lot to learn about talking to teenagers, as Nunzio’s mother informed me at high volume during the recently concluded, half-hour tongue lashing she imparted.  Her tirade began and ended with the same incredulous question: “How could you tell a 15-year-old you tried drugs, and liked them!!!?” 

When I finally got a word in edgewise, I offered her the benefit of my logic: “I told him the truth.  What else was I supposed to do, lie?” 

She sounded even more outraged as she replied: “My son’s first words after telling me about your conversation were: ‘I can’t wait to go to college!’ So I’d have to say yes, that’s exactly what you should’ve done!!!” 

“Oh.”

marijuana

cocaine

lsd

Just a few of the drugs no 15-year-old should ever try


Comments

#34 – Anything but the Truth — 8 Comments

  1. Yep, sometimes erring on the side of caution is a good idea. It’s the proper instinct around other people’s kids. Or you could take my initiative: don’t go near other people’s kids. My days always smell better that way.

  2. Generally speaking, I’m with you.  But those pesky nieces and nephews seem hard to avoid.  If only there was a bug repellant that worked on kids too.

  3. I doubt you did any real damage. Any kid who would share that conversation with that maternal barracuda and follow it by sharing his excitement about getting loaded has obviously played around with enough chemicals to damage his brain. It’s either that or it’s that the Gambino gene pool needs a good, strong dose of chlorine. (You may want to climb out and towel off!)

  4. Nope. Wasn’t there. But, as I recall, the story about it appeared on page 2 of the local rag, The Georgia Cracker. My condolences.

  5. Oddly, I’m not familiar with that respected news journal.  Perhaps it’s usually hidden behind the twenty-five different guns and ammo magazines on the shelf at the bookstore. 

  6. …not to mention those magazines guys read for the great articles(the ones with the plastic wrap that hides the pic on the cover)that are best-sellers in Georgia, ‘Hayboy,’ ‘Rustler,’ and ‘Sheep Gone Wild.’

  7. Now hold on there.  I don’t think there are many sheep farmers here in Georgia.  Goats, certainly.  Sheep, not so sure.

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